When it all falls apart

There is a song by FEE. It is called, "Everything Falls." My favorite lyrics are the following- "When everything falls apart Your arms hold me together When everything falls apart You’re the only hope for this heart When everything falls apart And my strength is gone I find You mighty and strong You keep holding on, You keep holding on" We have had a wonderful week at our house, but it has been tragic in our Church and community and even with some bloggy friends. True tragedy. I don't even feel like a real hip hip hoorah on our front because of all that has happened around us. It is hard to imagine what these families are going through. I will share a little just to get it out. I can't keep it in any longer. If you read this blog or you know me you know we lost our son at birth. It was a tragedy for us, but to loose one of my living children today I just can't fathom what that would be like. I really can't. On Thursday a week ago, our church family lost an 11 year old boy in a tragic car accident. The boy was hit by a car while trying to catch the bus. Although we did not know him personally, his family attended our church and many of our close friends knew the family and their children were friends with this child. The whole thing has just been so tragic for this family and for this group of middle school children who just don't understand GOD's timing. It is so hard for us as adults to explain this to children when truly GOD has not given us the ability to explain it. It just is and that is all you can say. My precious oldest is now an alter server and two months ago we found out that her alter serving buddy has been diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma. He is 11. Should an 11 year old boy have to know what Hodgkin's Lymphoma means? I personally don't think it is fair that such a sweet, funny, and caring kid should have to know what this is and how it has to be treated. He should not have to go through grueling chemo treatments and loose his cute hair and deal with very adult life and death issues. My girl is seeing it up close and personal. Her friend served with her on Saturday. He is still the funny, sweet, caring kid he always was, but he is also pale and bald. He has had some very bad days and probably still has some ahead. I cried when I saw him walk up this week with my girl. I just tried not to show it. His parents were two pews behind me. I just am heartbroken to see him like this and we as a family are praying for him every time we pray. My heart breaks for this family. I am sure his mother had a rough week as a member of her sons youth group was buried. It had to hit her like a ton of bricks. I have weeped for her and her husband as she has had to deal with her own son's illness and now this tragedy as well. We are stacking tragedy here. I have blogged about a single mom whose husband died last summer. She and her husband have two young children and had just started the process to adopt again. After dealing with several months of anguish over what to do and then finally deciding to go through with the adoption she has once again been thrown a very heartbreaking blow. She had to go through more months of paperwork to bring her precious little girl home due to the fact she is now considered single. She finally got approval before Christmas and three weeks ago she received her paperwork to come to China. What a journey it had been. Then she got the news that has shocked our adoption community. This child that she has fought her own heart for is dying in a hospital in China. She has a terminal brain tumor and she is dying. I can not understand GOD's timing. I truly don't understand it. I don't. I can not imagine how this has happened. One dad on an adoption blog, who is quite insightful, came to a conclusion. Is it possible that this little girl's Daddy in Heaven, the father that fell in love with this little girl when he saw her sweet face in a picture, is it possible that he wanted her to be in Heaven with him. Maybe, just maybe, God thought she needed to be in Heaven with her Daddy. I am going to cling to this conclusion because nothing else makes since. Nothing. Once again this mother and her children grieve. They grieve the loss of a child and sibling. I am sure they are once again grieving the loss of a husband and father as well. I pray that this child does not suffer and that she dies knowing she has a family that loves her and is painfully mourning their loss. It is just so sad, so tragic, and so awful. As I and other parents think through maybe it truly is God's timing. If this mom had been able to bring this little one home sooner, all of this would have been on her. She would have been dealing with this tragedy by herself and with her young children in tow. She would have had the day in and out of it all on her. Maybe GOD thought this way was easier. It has been an insane two weeks. Our lives have changed for the better and all of these lives have been hit with tragedy. I don't understand God's timing and I guess I never will. I pray that good will come from all of this. I pray for comfort in each of these circumstances. I pray that God will heal and give peace to all, especially these children that are trying to make since of it all. As the song says, "God is mighty and strong and He keeps holding on!" If we don't cling to GOD in our worst times, he can't be there to carry us. He has carried me through many a heartache and I pray that he carries each of these families through this time in their lives. 29“Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” 31 Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. ...” Matthew 14:29-31 NIV