Life and Death

It funny to me how loss makes you think more about life in general and the loss of life. I have spent the last two in this nowhere area of me. It is like zombieville. I enjoy Christmas so much, but I knew something was missing. I have not felt this way since I lost my son in 2001. It is a weird feeling, you want to enjoy the celebration of it all but you don't feel like you should. It is like there is something wrong with celebrating it so soon after you have lost someone. It is just a weird and unexplainable feeling. I may spend the next week working on this one topic so if you are out there reading it bare with me. So weirdness for me comes in groups. Mark gave me a book while in TN to read. I started it there and finished it right after Christmas. It was about death and dying. Then in our family gift exchange I got another book that focused once again about life and death. More death than life. It is strange how a theme just hangs over you for a while. It just won't seem to let me go. I thought today about taking down the Christmas decorations now that we have celebrated the birth of our LORD, it is time for us Catholics to start the focus on His death. Life and death again shows up in my head. Weird. So this will be at least a two part deal and maybe three. I will start with how the last three weeks have been and then work my way to my thoughts on the future.